The other day I drove twenty minutes across town with both of my littles in the backseat – Judah strapped into his car seat, Levi… not.
I pulled in the driveway, opened Levi’s door, reached in to help him out… and saw it: the unbuckled belt.
Trying not to burst into tears (and frighten him) I squeezed him tight and told him I was sorry and asked him for forgiveness and thanked God nothing happened and kicked myself for being too busy to notice and rejoiced that all was well… all at once.
Between Judah crying, running late for lunch and naps, getting both kids into the car in a busy parking lot, trying not to lose it while geting the stroller folded up and crammed into our tiny trunk, and stuffing the groceries into the front seat of our car… I forgot one of the two most crucial steps. Judah was buckled, but not my Levi.
Not my best moment.
(Makes me want to cry just thinking about it now.)
I later told Ryan what I did and the first thing he said was, “Are you ok?”
Seriously? Are you OK?
That’s how amazing my husband is.
Obviously he knew Levi was fine. And he knew that I would have been shaken up and ready to tear my clothes and rub ashes on my face and send myself into exile outside the city. So while some would be quick to scold or reprimand or “ugh” in disgust, he simply asked if I was ok.
That, my friends, is grace.
He gave me exactly what I didn’t deserve… but what I needed.
I think about God and hte grace he gives us (oh! the GRACE that we made it home safely with no accident… I’d have never forgiven myself). And I hold in my hand such a tangible example of grace extended to me, both in our protection and in my husband’s response to my carelessness.
God knows I’m sorry. God knows I’ve learned a lesson. God knows that rebuking me would do nothing to make things better.
Apparently my husband knows all that stuff too.
That day I saw God in the response of a man.
How grateful I am for him, and to get to wake up tomorrow morning and celebrate the most glorious day he was born.
Ryan: God’s grace to me.
Q for you: When’s the last time you unintentionally messed up big time? Was grace extended to you? (I hope so.)
p.s. I hope you don’t think I’m an incredibly irresponsible mother. I posted this thinking that most of us probably have a story like this to share. How I wish I could be sure it was my last. 😦
Click Clink Five | five minutes a day, unedited
Adriel also writes on motherhood & parenting at The Mommyhood Memos.