Tag Archives: change

Where’s this pain coming from, really?

For days I walked around, gritting my teeth. Not meaning to, but as a reaction to the pain.

I just could not shake the headache. Not by drinking gallons of water, not by sleeping, not by popping pills, not by a shoulder and neck rub.

Nothing seemed to help.

It was so bad that one night it even kept me from falling asleep. (Doesn’t pain generally do the opposite?)

And then I realized…

Wait, this has happened to me before.

My contacts were in the wrong eyes.

Soemtime last week I must have put them in the wrong side of the case and have been wearing them backwards ever since.

I can still see okay. My perscription from eye to eye doesn’t differ enough to be overt. But the eye strain is obvious in the thump, thump, thump in my forehead and behind my eyes.

I throw them out, start with a new pair.

And I wonder how many times I do this in other areas of my life:

How many times do I make a small change – one hardly noticable – that affects so much?

How many times has one wrong decision brought so much discomfort?

How many times do I carry around hurt, trying to ignore it and hoping it will go away when really it just needs to be dealt with?

How many times do I just need to remove the problem and start with a fresh perspective?

How many times do I simply need to stop and ask where is this pain coming from, really?

STOP.

 

Q for you: How’s  your “vision”?

 

Love,
A

 

Click Clink Five | Five minutes a day, unedited


Loose ends coming together

By nature I’m a connector.

I like to know context and history.

I naturally see patterns.

I think it’s part of the creative process – seeing how life is interlocked and overlapping – and then interpreting it all in light of what’s already been.

And when things feel disconnected, I feel fragmented. Somehow.

But this is not one of those times of disconnect.

I feel like I can see through this window of a place I’ve not yet been… but the glimpse of what’s inside is making lots of little things start to make sense.

Convergence.

Alignment.

Relationships forming, vision shaping, web spinning, Word coming.

There’s a Jesus element to it that’s hard to explain.

But it’s there. I feel it in my bones.

One of those seasons that marks a life moving forward.

Loose ends coming together; The beginning of change.

STOP.

 

Q for you: Sometimes I write far too late at night and then this is what comes out – stream-of-conscious jibberish. But could you possibly have an inkling of what I’m talking about? What do you feel like when change is in the air?

 

Love,
A

 

Click Clink Five | Five minutes a day, unedited


The day off I didn’t have

It’s been a big week:

Babies.

Toddlers.

Growth spurts.

The big D.

Tantrums.

Hot, humid days.

Full plates.

Long lists.

Waking babies and insomniac mommies.

Emails.

Lists.

Meetings.

Responsibilities.

Good-byes.

Hellos.

Short naps. Long naps.

Fasting (out of necessity, not choice).

Did I mention the big D?

I’ve been grumpy for much of the week. Sick, tired, and grumpy… and trying not to be.

Cuz a grumpy mommy is no fun for sweet kiddos or lovely husbands.

Being sick made me lose my mothering mojo. I lost my groove. I misplaced my stellar.

I had moments of wanting to trade them in. (Shhh, don’t tell.(

But today helped turn things around.

Today Ryan watched the boys while I holed up in my office and worked. Worked all. day. long. on stuff that’s been piling up. (He even delivered an enormous sandwich – my own personal take-out – without me putting an order in.)

It was glorious.

I felt like such a grown-up, doing grown-up things and listenting to grown-up music and using my grown-up brain.

Turns out I didn’t need a day off at all.

I just needed a day… that was different from the norm.

It’s true what they say: sometimes the best vacation is change.

STOP.

 

Q for you: When is the last time you had a day of change?

 

Love,
A

 

Click Clink Five is a blog by Adriel Booker. | Five minutes a day, unedited. | 2012 All rights reserved. | Adriel also writes on parenting and motherhood at The Mommyhood Memos.