Tag Archives: stream-of-conscious

Life, unedited.

The clock ticks rudely and I never realized how loud the fridge really is.

Muffled laughter seeps in from the neighbors and I can hear a train several blocks away.

It’s noisy here in the quiet.

My house is a little messy, but it’s clean under those toys, thanks to Rose.

On the shelves sits a plant starting to droop, asking for a drink. I forgot again today. Even looking at it now, I think – she’ll be ok until tomorrow.

There’s a printed out calendar sheet on the fridge at waist level with big green numbers counting down the sleeps until we “take suitcase on pane to ‘merica”.

Several boxes of ziplock bags are stacked in the corner containing blades and gloves and soap and things that one might see as “stuff” and another might see as a chance at life.

A small pile of baby clothes outgrown, folded neatly on the chair. Ready to fly to an island to be traded for fish so they can clothe Jesus there.

My eyes blur, my jaws clenched (again), and my shoulders raised too close to my ears.

I think about the bathtub I hope to one day have.

Relax. Breathe. Sleep. Those things have been hard lately.

But there’s a strange sweetness in the struggle. Prayers in the form of one and two and three-word pleas.

He answers, you know.

I wait for it.

But sometimes the wait is hard.

And sometimes cookies really do make things better. (I never understood comfort food before. But now I want some cookies.)

He answers, you know.

 

STOP.

 

Love,
A

 

Click Clink Five| Five minutes a day, unedited

 

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Loose ends coming together

By nature I’m a connector.

I like to know context and history.

I naturally see patterns.

I think it’s part of the creative process – seeing how life is interlocked and overlapping – and then interpreting it all in light of what’s already been.

And when things feel disconnected, I feel fragmented. Somehow.

But this is not one of those times of disconnect.

I feel like I can see through this window of a place I’ve not yet been… but the glimpse of what’s inside is making lots of little things start to make sense.

Convergence.

Alignment.

Relationships forming, vision shaping, web spinning, Word coming.

There’s a Jesus element to it that’s hard to explain.

But it’s there. I feel it in my bones.

One of those seasons that marks a life moving forward.

Loose ends coming together; The beginning of change.

STOP.

 

Q for you: Sometimes I write far too late at night and then this is what comes out – stream-of-conscious jibberish. But could you possibly have an inkling of what I’m talking about? What do you feel like when change is in the air?

 

Love,
A

 

Click Clink Five | Five minutes a day, unedited