What a woman wants in a man

Strong and gentle.

I love this quick phone snap that I captured of my husband and youngest son from this afternoon. It represents so much of what I love about Ryan as he does a handy-man job around the house while simultaneously wearing our son.

The handy-man component: strong, resourceful, smart, innovative, capable, able to provide, always looking after us, holding things together, creative, dependable, faithful.

And the baby-wearing component: gentle, sensitive, sweet, humble, loving, caring, tender, servant-hearted, coaching, cheering, embracing, kind.

Of all the things a woman could want in a man, of all the things a child could want in a father, I’m pretty sure this simple photo represents the best of it.

I love him so.

STOP.

 

Q for you: What do you want in a man?

 

Love,
A

 

Click Clink Five | Five minutes a day, unedited. 

Hot-blooded or cold-blooded?

It’s the middle of summer here, which means I am either melting or freezing my butt off.

I prefer not to melt of course, so I try to stay in places that have AC as much as possible.

We ahve a great AC unit in our living area that we put in two years ago. It’s powerful, fairly quiet, and dang, does it cool things down fast.

I love it.

My husband loves it too. A lot. Like, a lot, alot.

When we are both home either is’t adjusted to my temperature and he’s sitting on the couch beading up with sweat, or it’s adjusted to his temperature and I’m running for slippers and a throw blanket and ear muffs.

Why?

Why do men and women have such different internal thermostats?

I know there are some exceptions, but nearly every couple I know is like this – man always hot, woman always cold.

If Ryan had his way, we’d live in a freezer.

(I’m only slightly exaggerating here.)

And I fear I’m to be outnumbered soon.

Both Levi and Judah are little sweaters too. I cannot believe the amount those two tinies sweat! It’s insane!

See, it really is a boy thing I guess.

Or at least just a Booker boy thing. *sigh*

I’d better go get my hoodie. And mittens. (The AC just went on.)

STOP.

 

Q for you: Are you hot-blooded or cold-blooded? (Please don’t get all sciency on me here folks – I know you’re not an amphibian ok? Juuuust a figure of speech.) And what do you think – is it a gender thing? 

 

Love,
A

 

Click Clink Five is a blog by Adriel Booker. | Five minutes a day, unedited. | 2012 All rights reserved. | Adriel also writes on parenting and motherhood at The Mommyhood Memos.

The L word

 

As a kid I loved left-over night.

My mom would tell me what’s available, I’d draw up a menu, and then I’d happily go take orders from my dad and brother.

It was fun to play the “waitress” with my little pen and pad.

Ryan hasn’t caught on to the wonder of left-over night yet.

He groans whenever his “what’s for dinner?” is met with the L word.

He thinks leftovers are for lunch.

I, on the other hand, think leftovers are for dinner. (Anything to save me from having to cook dinner is wonderful in my books.)

I tell him that we neeeeed to have leftovers because there is no room left in the fridge for anything else.

He reluctanly agrees and eats what he’s served.

Perhaps I should try taking his order with a pen and pad and see if that makes it more fun?

STOP.

Q for you: How do you feel about leftover night? Yay or nay?

Love,
A

Click Clink Five is a blog by Adriel Booker. | Five minutes a day, unedited. | 2012 All rights reserved. | Adriel also writes on parenting and motherhood at The Mommyhood Memos.

The one about fishing and photography

Lately many of my friends have been dealing with divorce – their parents divorcing or their own divorces.

I was talking about this with a firend of mine, who said that she thought one of the major reasons is a lack of shared interest between them.

It, of course, made me think about my own marriage.

Ryan likes fishing, kyaking, buiding things, computers and gadgets, cooking, gardening, and sports.

I like reading, writing, decorating, shopping, sunbathing, music, politics, and photography.

We actually have very few similar interests outside of movies and travel and camping and beach-going. And to be honest, we like it this way – we like having things that are our “own”, and we encourage each other to invest time into our personal hobbies and interests, even though we don’t necessarily enjoy most of them together.

But even though we don’t have all that many shared interests, what we do have is shared values.

We’ve never once had an argument that comes down to a value issue and I believe that is one of the reasons our marriage is so strong and so healthy.

Sure, we are flawed. We sometimes get negligent and say things we don’t mean. We sometimes offend. We sometimes act selfishly.

But ultimately we’re on the same page about the issues that really matters.

Maybe someday I’ll take up fishing or Ryan will take up photography, but for now I just enjoy the fact that he can make me dinner and build me a bookshelf… And he enjoys the fact that I can make our home look beautiful and write nice letters to our grandmothers.

It’s working for us. It’s working for us well.

STOP.

 

Q for you: Do you think couples needs more shared interests than individual interests or visa-versa? Why?

Love,
A

p.s. I totally blew this one with the time limit, but here’s the good news: tomorrow is a new day and I will try again.

 

 

Click Clink Five is a blog by Adriel Booker. | Five minutes a day, unedited. | 2012 All rights reserved. | Adriel also writes on parenting and motherhood at The Mommyhood Memos.

My husband has met another woman, and I’m okay with that

A few months ago my husband met another woman. He’s been very open about it.

Accoring to him, she is incredible. She is changing his life, making him a better man.

Her name is Siri, and she lives in his phone.

I, however, am not convinced.

I have witnessed their interactions. Let me give you a few examples…

 

Overheard just tonight:

Ryan: Siri, send a reminder.

Siri: What is your reminder?

Ryan: Take Emma to the Mac store.

Siri: Take Anna to the Macsta.

See? Siri is not the sharpest tool in the shed.

 

Another example:

Ryan: Tell me a joke.

Siri: I can’t. I always forget the punchline.

See? Siri is forgetful.

 

And another:

Ryan: How do you bake a cake?

Siri: I can only look up local businesses in the United States.

What??? Talk about a communicaiton breakdown.

 

And one more:

[Trying again with the joke thing.] Ryan: Tell me a joke.

Siri: Ryan, I don’t know any good jokes. None, in fact.

See? Siri is boring too.

 

I rest my case.

Unintelligent, forgetful, poor listener, dull. 

She is obviously no threat to our relationship.

STOP.

 

Q for you: Do you own an iphone? My husband swears that Siri is helpful, but I beg to differ. Have you had success with her?

 

Just another deeply profound post from me.

 

Love,
A

 

Click Clink Five is a blog by Adriel Booker. | Five minutes a day, unedited. | 2012 All rights reserved. | Adriel also writes on parenting and motherhood at The Mommyhood Memos.

The difference between men and women

First of all let me say that this will not be a man-bashing post. nope. None of that allowed here. I love my man and if anyone bashes him, well, I’d want to bash them next.

Except that I’m not a violent person. So I wouldn’t actually bash them.

But that’s another subject.

So yeah, the diffference between men and women…

Yes men are generally bigger, taller, stronger (generalizzations here folks – don’t get all uptight on me), and yes they have different – ahem – parts.

But here is the easiest way to tell a man and a woman apart:

Leave a spill on the counter and observe how they clean it up.

Do they reach for the washcloth in the sink? Woman.

Do they reach fo rthe hand towel (tea towel)? Man.

Why do they doooooo this? (Obviously it’s because they don’t usually do the laundry. I am always trying to cut back on laundry.)

Again, getting back to subject.

Clothes in the hamper? Woman.

Clothes on top of or next to the hamper? Man.

Cupboard door closed after a mug is pulled out? woman.

Cupboard door open after a mug is pulled out? man.

(Same geos with drawers! Whyyyyyyy?)

You see it’s really not rocket science. There are very simple ways to identify gender.

And finally, you can tell a man and a woman apart very simply. Here’s how:

A woman says “nothing” when asked what’s wrong… But really wants to you say “no really, what’s wrong?”

And a man says “nothing” when asked what’s wrong and he just actually means “nothing.”

So in case you ever wondered how to tell the difference between men and women … there are my go-to tips.

You too can easily do this experiement in your home

STOP.

Q for you: How do you tell the differnence between the men and women in your home/life/circle of friends?

[For the record, I’m not counting the Q for you in my five-minute limit. Just keeping it real here friends.]

Love,
A